Sometimes my inner defeatist gets the best of me and I’m convinced I’ll never get to a healthy weight. Right now, my inner defeatist the loudest voice in my head.
The day after I finished the Dr. Oz cleanse, I was down 7 lbs. The next day, 5 of those were back, and they haven’t budged. I’ve been staring at the same number on the scale for weeks, minus the loss from the cleanse.
I’ve been working out, hard, daily. With Max in school I can devote more time to the gym and I’ve been trying to things to knock my body out of it’s rut. I’m getting more than the daily recommended amount of exercise. I’m doing some light weight lifting too to help with toning.
It’s my food. It’s always my food. I start the morning with good intentions. I have a healthy green smoothie and I put it in my tracker. I usually track my lunch. Then it goes downhill from there.
Now that I stay at home, I’m surrounded by more temptation. There’s always a treat for Max or Brett in the kitchen. Last week it’s been fudge and jerky brought home from our recent Michigan vacation. Yesterday it was cookies that Max and I made to bring to Chicago.
I know what to do. Chew gum. Wait 10 minutes to make sure I really want it. Find something else to occupy myself. Do I do it? No. I feel like I have a mental block. Like I don’t want to lose band enough. What is scaring me about this process? Do I not want to give up the foods I love? Do I not want my entire life to revolve around my diet plans? I don’t know. I’m just rambling in hopes that I can find some breakthrough in journaling.
It’s time to set some small goals to help me get going. Here is my goal for the first week of September.
1) Track ALL FOOD 4 out of 7 days.
2) Take all vitamins and probiotics 6 of 7 days.
3) Spend 30 minutes each day on Spark People
4) Take measurements. Maybe I’m losing inches but not lbs.
Also, in order to make the possibility of weight loss more tangible, I’m setting up some weight loss rewards
5 lbs- pair of shoes
10 lbs-60 min massage
15 lbs- A new purse
20 lbs- 90 min massage
Weight Change from last week: +1.2
I put of handful of greens in my milkshake (and it is definitely bordering more on milkshake than smoothie with the scoops of coconut icecream replacing the yogurt..) - that counts for something right? Kinda my focus now is just adding more produce to my meals. Somedays it goes better than others and only very rarely do I meat my goal of way back when of eating at least 10 servings of veggies a day. I know I should be more mindful of my munching but really lack the motivation of taking the time to track calories on my fitness pal. I work with some girls that have been super dedicated to their diets (one just competed in a body building competition - and won 1st in her group!) and some nights I feel like I'm the only one still eating carbs. I want to lose some weight get fitter but am not willing to restrict my diet that much which leaves me feeling guilty/defeated/unmotivated. I have stuck with 4 weeks of the couch to 5k which is further than I've ever gotten with it but have yet to use the YMCA membership I got a couple weeks ago. So basically you are my hero. I am so impressed with you on so many levels, and on a totally shallow level on how lovely and put together you looked the whole time we visited. ;) so enough rambling about my own issues. My suggestions for you biggest snack times is to make plans to eat. You may still end up grabbing a piece of fudge or whatnot but don't get stuck in the guilt cycle of forbidding yourself from doing so. Instead just decide that you will eat a full serving of fruit before making dinner (or whenever the munchies start) and have at least one serving of chopped up veggies on the counter while you make dinner that you are required to finish before dinner is on the table. Something similar if after dinner is a hard time. I do less middle of the night munching at the nurses station if I remember I have to eat my prepacked snacks before I consider the candy bowl. Keep us posted on what's working for you!
Thanks Em! I appreciate your insight and you sharing your own struggles. I like the idea of making myself have fruit/veggies on hand that I can snack on while making dinner. That usually when I'm at my worst!
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